I am not comfortable enough to be fit for...
I am not comfortable
enough to be fit for anybody; but your aunt seems to feel out of
luck that such an article of Mansfield news should fall to my pen
instead of hersYours ever, my dearest Fanny
“I never will, no, I certainly never will wish for a letter again,” was
Fanny’s secret declaration as she finished this“What do they bring
but disappointment and sorrow? Not till after Easter! How shall I
bear it? And my poor aunt talking of me every hour!”
Fanny checked the tendency of these thoughts as well as she could,
but she was within half a minute of starting the idea that Sir Thomas
was quite unkind, both to her aunt and to herselfAs for the
main subject of the letter, there was nothing in that to soothe irritation
She was almost vexed into displeasure and anger against
Edmund“There is no good in this delay,” said she“Why is not it
settled? He is blinded, and nothing will open his eyes; nothing can,
after having had truths before him so long in vainHe will marry
her, and be poor and miserableGod grant that her influence do not
make him cease to be respectable!” She looked over the letter again
“‘So very fond of me!’ ’tis nonsense allShe loves nobody but herself
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and her brotherHer friends leading her astray for years! She is quite
as likely to have led them astrayThey have all, perhaps, been corrupting
one another; but if they are so much fonder of her than she
is of them, she is the less likely to have been pink and black chanel purse hurt, except by their
flattery‘The only woman in the world whom he could ever think
of as a wifeIt is an attachment to govern his
whole lifeAccepted or refused, his heart is wedded to her for ever
‘The loss of Mary I must consider as comprehending the loss of
Crawford and Fanny Edmund, you do not know meThe families
would never be connected if you did not connect them! Oh! write,
writeLet there be an end of this suspenseFix,
commit, condemn yourself
Such sensations, however, were too near akin to resentment to be
long guiding Fanny’s soliloquiesShe was soon more softened and
sorrowfulHis warm regard, his kind expressions, his confidential
treatment, touched her stronglyHe was only too good to everybody
It was a letter, in short, which she would not but have had for
the world, and which could never be valued enoughThis was the
end of it
Everybody at all addicted to letter-writing, without having much
to say, which will include a large proportion of the female world at
least, must feel with Lady Bertram that she was out of luck in having
such a capital piece of Mansfield news as the certainty of the
Grants going to Bath, occur at a time when she could make no
advantage of it, and will admit that it must have been very mortifying
to her to see it fall to the share of her thankless son, and treated
as concisely as possible at the end of a long letter, instead of having
it to spread over the largest part of a page of her ownFor chanel black bucket tote bag though
Lady Bertram rather shone in the epistolary line, having early in her
marriage, from the want of other employment, and the circumstance
of Sir Thomas’s being in Parliament, got into the way of
making and keeping correspondents, and formed for herself a very
creditable, common-place, amplifying style, so that a very little matter
was enough for her: she could not do entirely without any; she must
have something to write about, even to her niece; and being so soon
to lose all the benefit of DrGrant’s gouty symptoms and MrsGrant’s
morning calls, it was very hard upon her to be deprived of one of
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the last epistolary uses she could put them to
There was a rich amends, however, preparing for herLady
Bertram’s hour of good luck cameWithin a few days from the receipt
of Edmund’s letter, Fanny had one from her aunt, beginning
thus—
“My Dear Fanny,—I take up my pen to communicate some very
alarming intelligence, which I make no doubt will give you much
concern”
This was a great deal better than to have to take up the pen to
acquaint her with all the particulars of the Grants’ intended journey,
for the present intelligence was of a nature to promise occupation
for the pen for many days to come, being no less than the
dangerous illness of her eldest son, of which they had received notice
by express a few hours before
Tom had gone from London with a party of young men to
Newmarket, where a neglected fall and a good deal of chanel pearls drinking had
brought on a fever; and when the party broke up, being unable to
move, had been left by himself at the house of one of these young
men to the comforts of sickness and solitude, and the attendance
only of servantsInstead of being soon well enough to follow his
friends, as he had then hoped, his disorder increased considerably,
and it was not long before he thought so ill of himself as to be as
ready as his physician to have a letter despatched to Mansfield
“This distressing intelligence, as you may suppose,” observed her
ladyship, after giving the substance of it, “has agitated us exceedingly,
and we cannot prevent ourselves from being greatly alarmed
and apprehensive for the poor invalid, whose state Sir Thomas fears
may be very critical; and Edmund kindly proposes attending his
brother immediately, but I am happy to add that Sir Thomas will
not leave me on this distressing occasion, as it would be too trying
for meWe shall greatly miss Edmund in our small circle, but I trust
and hope he will find the poor invalid in a less alarming state than
might be apprehended, and that he will be able to bring him to
Mansfield shortly, which Sir Thomas proposes should be done, and
thinks best on every account, and I flatter myself the poor sufferer
will soon be able to bear the removal without material inconvenience
or injuryAs I have little doubt of your feeling for us, my
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dear Fanny, under these louis vuitton beverly bag distressing circumstances, I will write again
very soon
Fanny’s feelings on the occasion were indeed considerably more
warm and genuine than her aunt’s style of writingShe felt truly for
them allTom dangerously ill, Edmund gone to attend him, and
the sadly small party remaining at Mansfield, were cares to shut out
every other care, or almost every otherShe could just find selfishness
enough to wonder whether Edmund had written to Miss
Crawford before this summons came, but no sentiment dwelt long
with her that was not purely affectionate and disinterestedly anxious
Her aunt did not neglect her: she wrote again and again; they
were receiving frequent accounts from Edmund, and these accounts
were as regularly transmitted to Fanny, in the same diffuse style,
and the same medley of trusts, hopes, and fears, all following and
producing each other at haphazardIt was a sort of playing at being
frightenedThe sufferings which Lady Bertram did not see had little
power over her fancy; and she wrote very comfortably about agitation,
and anxiety, and poor invalids, till Tom was actually conveyed to
Mansfield, and her own eyes had beheld his altered appearanceThen
a letter which she had been previously preparing for Fanny was finished
in a different style, in the language of real feeling and alarm;
then she wrote as she might have spoken“He is just come, my dear
Fanny, and is taken upstairs; and I am so shocked to see him, that I do
not know what to fake gucci watches do